Memories of an Accident
by mcanna
Summary: Consequences of the post-it wedding. Takes place after season 5. A merder story.
1. Chapter 1

It is late, dark and raining. A tire explodes and the car flips over, one time, two times, three times. Not a sound is heard, both the driver and the passenger are hanging upside down in their seatbelts. The airbags are inflated.

The car is almost invisible from the road but a young boy in a passing car spots the backlights and his father stops and backtracks. The car is resting on its roof. "Dad, do you see. There are people in it." His father is already punching the numbers on his cell phone.

First to arrive is a police car followed by the ambulances. Both passengers are carefully removed. The woman is bleeding from small cuts, nothing severe, but a red bruise on her right temple. She is unconscious. The man needs to be cut loose. His left leg is broken and he has a large bump and a small cut on his forehead. He is also unconscious.

The ambulances take them to the nearest ER in a small town about 100 km south of Seattle. The doctor on call is doing an exam of the woman when she opens her eyes and moans. The nurse by her side hears her. "Hi there, what's your name dear?" The woman looks confused and scared. The nurse continues "can you please tell me your name and your friend's name?" "My friend?"

The man wakes up shortly in the ambulance and asks the paramedics, "Is she OK?" The paramedic says "Your friend is already in the ER. What is your name and what is her name?" The man doesn't answer he is out again.

In the ER it is soon decided that the man needs an ortho who can puzzle the man's left leg together. He will probably need an implant to replace a part that is crushed. They decide to send him by ambulance to Seattle Grace Hospital where Dr Torres can work her magic. She is the best in the state and this man really needs magic to be able walk without a cane.

At the same time the woman gets unconscious again and stops breathing. The doctor intubates her but since the hospital doesn't have a MRI they decide to airvac her to Seattle Grace Hospital. The neuro guy is world famous and they have a MRI.

The phone rings at trauma bay. "Dr Hunt, you are needed on the roof and an ambulance is transferring a victim of a car accident in need of Torres, ETA 25 minutes. The chopper ETA 5 minutes, patient on respirator, severe head trauma." "Page neuro and ortho" Dr Hunt answers "and I need Dr Bailey and Dr Karev with his interns. Make Dr Karev meet me at the roof."

Dr Derek Shepherd is on the ferryboat, finally going home when he gets the page. He is daydreaming, almost sleeping after a long 14 hours shift. His last surgery took longer than expected and right now is a beer and a massage what he wants, needs, almost as much as he needs Meredith. She and Mark are expected home, from a consult south of Seattle, about now. Maybe she's already at the trailer. The beeping is so not wanted. It is a 911 and Derek calls trauma bay and tells the nurse in charge that he will be back in 45 minutes. First, the ferryboat must dock and return to Seattle. They will have to do with residents and Dr Bailey for the time being. He calls Meredith to tell him that he will be late but her phone goes to voicemail, so does Marks phone. They must be in a non service area.

The police, who first arrived at the crash site, walk into the ER. He asks about the victims and is told that Jane and John Doe are transferred to Seattle Grace Hospital. That's good because they both work there as doctors. He has found there Id-cards in the car and will now send their belongings to Seattle.


	2. Chapter 2

Dr Hunt and Dr Karev are waiting under the roof for the chopper. "How is Dr Stevens?" Dr Hunt asks. "She'll be home this weekend and will continue with outpatient's treatment next week" Alex answers. "Good, good"

They hear the chopper and Dr Hunt is very careful not to look at the rotor blades. He keeps his eyes on his sneakers. They both run to the open door while two interns hold umbrellas over their heads. The patient is unloaded, she is wrapped in blankets and you can only see the tube to he respirator. The paramedic rattles off the patient's stats and name Jane Doe. In the elevator Dr Karev starts to unwrap the patient. When he suddenly stops Dr Hunt looks up from the chart. "What?" "Where is Derek?" Alex asks. "Where is Dr Shepherd?" An intern answers him "he went home 30 minutes ago." "Is he paged?" "Yes" answers Dr Hunt. "Page another one, another neuro, the second best, who is that? Who was Dr Shepherd's teacher? Call that doctor" Alex orders one of his interns. "Why can't Dr Shepherd take this patient?" Owen asks as he leans over the gurney. His face turns white, he stares at the patient's face, he stares at Dr Meredith Grey.

"Put her in trauma 2 and close the blinds" Dr Hunt rattles off. "And page Dr Webber ASAP. I want Dr Bailey here." "Dr Hunt, Meredith was on a consultation with Dr Sloan today" Alex says, "where is Mark?"

The intern comes back with a phone. "I have Dr Shepherd's teacher on the phone. He wants to talk to Dr Shepherd." "Give it to me" answers Dr Hunt. He explains the case and Dr Charles Witt who is in New York promise to come as soon as possible. Probably within 12 hours. He gives orders of a MRI and to keep monitoring. Dr Webber arrives together with Dr Bailey. "What can we do, what do you…" he trails off when he sees the patient. "Where is Derek?" "He phoned in 30 minutes ago" the trauma nurse answers. "I have called for a substitute, Dr Witt from New York" says Dr Hunt. "Fine, good, what have happened to her?" asks Dr Webber. "She was on a consultation today with Dr Sloan." Dr Karev answers "and that leads us to the final question, where is Sloan?"

"Car crash victim ETA 10 minutes" calls a nurse. Bailey, Hunt, Webber and Karev looks at each other. They can see that they all are thinking alike. "I'll go with Dr Webber" Dr Hunt says as Head of Trauma it is his call. Karev transfers Meredith to MRI.

The ambulance arrives to the ER and patient is as suspected Dr Mark Sloan. He is wheeled into trauma room 1, were Dr Webber and Dr Bailey exams his injuries. He need a MRI and a CT. Dr Torres gets out of surgery and walk towards the pit. Her intern Dr Lexie Grey trails along a couple of steps behind. Trauma 1 is closed but Dr Torres opens the door and stops on the threshold when she identifies the patient. Her first concern is to stop Lexie. She turns around and says "Please do monitor our patient and write my post-op notes." "OK Dr Torres, I'll be back in a while and help you out." "No," Dr Torres blurts out, "no, you go and get some sleep in an on-call room. I'll page you when I need you." Torres is acting strange, but sleep can never be over rated as an intern so she leaves the ER.

Dr Callie Torres walks slowly into the room. She asks for the chart. Dr Webber and Dr Bailey don't know much more than that Mark and Meredith was in a car crash and Mark had to be cut out of the car. The first X-rays taken at the other hospital are evaluated. Dr Torres sees directly why she is needed. About 5 cm of his left tibia is crushed; there is no way that can heal by it self. She orders a CT and a MRI to get to know more. Mark will need a titanium piece inserted, the question is how big. The surgery will have to wait until the morning and it can wait. "Dr Shepherd will have to evaluate his head trauma first," she says.

Dr Bailey starts to pull his gurney to the MRI when Dr Webber sees Dr Shepherd entering the ER-doors. "Over here Shep" he calls out. Shepherd looks up from his blackberry with a frown; there is still no answer from Mer or Mark.

Dr Webber opens trauma room 2 and motions Derek in. Derek looks around with a questionable frown; "where is the patient?" "Listen to me first" Webber says. "There are two patients, John and Jane Doe and they are at the MRI right now. There scans will be down in a couple of minutes. Meet us in conference room 5 in 10 minutes." Dr Webber hurries out and calls Bailey in the MRI tech-room. "Change Sloan and Grey's name s to John and Jane Doe in the computer." He has decided to keep Derek in the dark for a little while. At least until they know more about their conditions.

Mark and Meredith are both taken to the ICU and Bailey together with Karev make their way to conference room 5. They see Derek sitting by the table fiddling with his blackberry and Dr Webber with a grim face. Derek is starting to worry because there is still no answer. Karev takes the seat by the computer and brings up the first set of scans. It is John Doe and Bailey presents the updated chart. Derek can by looking at the scans diagnose a concussion grade II but he wants to do physical exam as well to confirm. "Yeah, hmmm, you can do that in a little while." Webber sends Bailey a look that Derek intercepts. He wonders what it means. Karev is also strange, he doesn't look at Derek at all, just stares down on the computer. The atmosphere in the room is tense.

Dr Webber clears his throat and asks Karev to bring up Jane Doe's scans on the board. Here they can see that there is a bleed and a cloth in her temple lobe. It is difficult to operate but possible for the best of surgeons. "I need an OR stat." Derek exclaims and starts rising from his chair. "Sit down Derek." Richard arks and Miranda puts a hand on his shoulder. Now Derek gets the feeling he sometimes have in the OR. He knows what is going to happen next. "No" he yells, "no, no, no, I'm one of the few that can do this surgery. There is no one here that can do it. I will not allow it. Where is she?" Then he answers his own question with "the ICU" and takes off running. He takes two steps at the time in the stairwell until he reaches the top floor. When he stops at the nurse station he asks loudly "where is she?" Dr Hunt steps out from a room on the left. "Owen, you better tell me now!" "Come here Shep and listen to me first." It looks like Shepherd is ready to hit him but he says "Where. Is. She?" There is a high sounding alarm from the room behind Dr Hunt and he swirls around and rushes back into the room. When he passes the blue button on the wall he pushes it and a voice over the speaker system announces "Code Blue room 8203, Code Blue room 8203" Shepherd follows the code team into the room but when he sees Dr Hunt lifting the paddles his tears start to run down his cheeks. His wife Meredith is being shocked. His mind flashes back and she is cold, blue and he has just pulled her out of the water after drowning. His knees buckle and he slowly slides down along the wall until he sits with his head on his knees.

Dr Hunt shocks her hearth and the heartbeat is back. Shepherd looks up at the steady sound of the machine monitoring her hearth. Dr Webber, DR Bailey and Dr Karev is also in the room. The code team is leaving. "We need to relieve some pressure on her brain" Dr Hunt says. "May I have a 10 blade, please?" Karev is already preparing Meredith and Webber is looking at Shepherd that is now standing at the foot of the bed. "Please leave Derek, you can't be here during this procedure." "No" Shepherd answers. I'll do the procedure. I don't trust anyone else. I won't allow it." Bailey and Webber try to push him out, away from the bed but he keeps moving forward. He grabs a pair of gloves and reaches for the scalpel. Dr Hunt stares at him. They all stare at him, but he has only one goal, one single thought and that is to save Meredith. Karev looks at Dr Webber who nods. He then puts the scalpel in Derek's hand. A small incision, "drill, please." Shepard slowly positions the drill at Meredith's temple. He can't see her face because it is covered with a blue sheet. Derek doesn't think any more he works on instinct and routine. The drill is moving and suddenly the blood pours out and Derek puts a catheter in place and secures it. He then steps back drops his gloves as he turns around and leaves the room in a run. Dr Webber finds him in the hallway puking his guts out in a bucket. He pushes Derek down into a chair. "You can not do her surgery." "There is no one here that can." "I know and that is why Dr Witt is on an airplane right now and land in about 5 hours and will be met by an ambulance to get here as soon as possible. She can be in the OR in less than 6 hours. We will monitor her during the night, keep her stable and prepare her for surgery in the morning." "Thank you." Shepherd whispers with his head in his hands. "Don't thank me, thank Dr Karev, he made a contact with Dr Witt minutes after he found out who Jane Doe was. Go back in there now, you did well." Shepherd slowly walks back, scared but thankful for the constant beep from the hearth monitor. He pulls a chair alongside the bed and takes her hand. He looks at her and she looks like she is sleeping, but then there is no snoring just the rhythmic sound of the respirator. His tears are falling and he rests his head on the bed. He is so tired. The other doctors leave him there.


	3. Chapter 3

An intern steps out of Mark Sloan's room across the hall.  
"He is waking up" he says. All doctors pushes through the door. Mark is stirring.  
"Open your eyes Mark" Webber says. "Open them. You are going to be OK. Just open your eyes." Dr Bailey checks his morphine drip. He is really going to need that. His pain must be excruciating. Mark slowly blinks, his eyes are slightly out of focus and his mind is racing. What is Dr Webber doing in his bedroom? And Bailey? Where is Lexie? He loves to wake up looking into her eyes, her smile.  
"You're at the hospital Mark. You are going to be OK. Torres just needs to do some magic on your leg. You were in an accident with Grey. Do you remember?" It is Dr Webber who is speaking to him. Where is Lexie, his little Grey? Was she in the accident as well? How is she? His thoughts whirl around in his head but his lips are not moving. The only word he can get out is  
"Grey".  
"She is in a room across the hall. Shepherd is with her" says Bailey. Why is Shepherd with his Grey? He has big Grey. Why is he with little Grey? Mark falls back to sleep.

The nurses check their patients every 10 minutes. Shepherd is sleeping with his head on Meredith's bed. Karev is sitting in Marks room for a while until he decides to go and find an on-call room. Someone is sleeping, snoring, in the top bunk bed but the bottom bunk is free.

Dr Hunt walks into Meredith's room at 5 am. He is followed by Dr Charles Witt.  
"Shep, wake up. Dr Witt is here." Derek lifts his head, his eyes are red and his face seems to have new lines etched into it.  
"What, who?" He looks around and sees the frame of his old teacher, neurosurgeon Charles Witt. He is close to 60 years old. His hair is almost gone but his steady gaze are the same. You can still see that he is good. Shepherd walks up to him and gets a hug.  
"Are you OK?" Witt asks.  
"I don't know but I'm sure thankful that you are here."  
"I'll give her a quick exam and get some new MRI scans. You can join just like old times. Page an intern, please" he says to Dr Hunt.

Karev's pager goes off and he almost falls to the floor trying to reach it. Almost at the same time does another pager start. The person in the top bunk bed mutters  
"Bailey". Both doctors straighten their scrubs and Lexie sends Alex a questionable look.  
"911?" she asks.  
"No Meredith" Alex answers before his brain connects the dots Lexie, half-sister, Meredith, head trauma, ICU, Mark, crash victims, Lexie doesn't know. Lexie start  
"Aren't Meredith and Derek off this weekend? What is Meredith doing here?"  
"Have to go, see you around" Alex hurries away towards the ICU. Lexie meets Bailey at the nurses' station. Bailey motions her back to the now empty on-call room.  
"Sit down Lexie, I have something important to tell you that concerns you." She explains that Meredith and Mark have been in a car crash and that both are in the ICU. They walk together to the ICU where they see Alex wheeling Meredith towards the MRI. Lexie rushes to her side and grabs her hand.  
"I love you sis, hang in there" she whispers in Meredith's ear. Derek and Dr Witt are walking just behind the gurney.

Dr Torres comes out of Mark's room.  
"Dr Shepherd" she calls, "I need you in here."  
"Not working" he answers, his eyes are never leaving Meredith's small frame.  
"It is Mark and I need you to clear him for surgery. Make sure he can take the anaesthetics." Mark, Shepherd realises is John Doe and has a concussion grade II and he, Shepherd, wanted to evaluate him yesterday. That was before he learnt that Jane Doe was Meredith. Now he really didn't want to leave her for a second. He is too scared, but Mark is his friend. He hesitates in his steps right when Dr Witt puts a hand on his arm.  
"Mark is that Mark Sloan your brother in crime?"  
"Yes, he was in the same accident as Meredith."  
"Dr Karev, bring Mrs Shepherd to the MRI, please. We will be right there. Come with me Shepherd and let's take a look at Sloan." Derek kisses Meredith's hand before he lets it go he whisper  
"I love you Mer." The other doctors look at Derek. He is not the normally cocky surgeon with god complex. He is more like a puppet doll who'll do whatever he is told.

Dr Torres leads them into the Mark's room where Lexie is sitting, holding his hand. Mark opens his eyes slowly when Torres, Shepherd and Witt enters the room.  
"Shepherd, why were you with little Grey yesterday? You have your own Grey."  
"I wasn't."  
"He wasn't." Both Derek and Lexie speak at the same time. Shepherd clarifies  
"I've been with Mer." Mark's eyes have left Shepherd and are now studying Dr Witt.  
"Why are you here?"  
"I'm here to do a surgery. I just wanted to say hi." He takes out his penlight and flashes it in Mark's eyes.  
"Who was Shepherd with last night?"  
"Big Grey" Mark answers.  
"He is as good as expected, you can do the surgery" he tells Dr Torres. "I'll have to go now. Bye Mark, see you later."  
"See you later." Derek and Dr Witt walks towards the MRI.  
"Mark is head of Plastics here at Seattle Grace, the intern is his girlfriend. She is also Meredith's half sister."  
"OK"

The MRI shows that the bleed hasn't stopped. Derek's tears are pouring down his cheeks.  
"Do the surgery" he says "and close up the gallery but for me, Meredith is no educational case. I'll be watching from the gallery."  
"No you are not a doctor on this case." Dr Webber intercepts the conversation. "You are to wait in the waiting area or in your office."  
"No, I'm watching from the gallery or scrubbing in, that's the condition for the surgery." Derek states. Dr Witt and Dr Webber exchange a look. Dr Witt says  
"OK, be in the gallery but stay away from the intercom." Dr Witt walks off towards the OR and Derek hurries to catch up with Meredith. He leans over her, kisses her forehead and whispers  
"Stay with me Mer. I can't do this without you. You are the love of my life." He watches the door close behind Alex. Is this the last time his life will have a meaning? He is well aware of the risks with the surgery but there isn't really any option. He slowly climbs the stairs to the gallery. When he enters he sees a figure slumping in a chair.  
"This is a closed gallery, get out now!" Cristina Yang just looks at him  
"Why didn't you call me? She is my person."  
"I haven't called anyone." He sits down besides her. They are both crying. Dr Witt enters the OR and the procedure begins. Derek turn the sound off the screen, he can't stand the sound of the drill.

He glances at the screen sometimes but he never looks through the glass. Mostly he stares at his hands. Why doesn't he wear a wedding ring? He thinks about Meredith and all her different moods. How flirty she was that first night at the bar, how she use to sit outside the trailer looking at the stars, how she twirls her watch when she gets nervous, how she yells at him when he says Meredith in an argument, how concentrated she is during surgery. But most of all he sees her eyes as they make love. How intense her green eyes get when she contracts around him and how her good her hair smells when she curls up against his chest.

He looks up and sees that Charles is trying to stop the bleed, the cloth is removes. It has already gone 3 hours and surgery is nearing its end. Cristina is staring at Meredith's face, her eyes has never left it since the surgery started. It is not like her to not study the screen and watch the surgery in detail.


	4. Chapter 4

Dr Charles Witt checks his last stitch and thanks the surgical team for their work. There is no movement in the gallery. Shepherd and another one are sitting there and they haven't moved during the whole time. All the 4 hours the surgery took. Charles pushes the intercom and barks  
"Shepherd, meet me in recovery." Derek jumps up and leaves Yang with a promise to page her when Meredith is in the ICU.

Dr Torres has been in surgery for the last couple of hours. Mark's crushed tibia is removed an a new piece made of titanium is inserted and connected. The surgery is straight forward and the only difficult part is measuring the exact length of the destroyed part. If the inserted part isn't exact, Mark will walk with a permanent limp. Dr Torres is so good it is close to magic to see her records of similar surgeries. She finishes up and Mark is also brought to recovery. He is put beside Meredith. She is still on the ventilator. Charles and Derek is standing at her bedside looking at her.  
"Shepherd, it can be awhile before she wakes up. You have to be aware of that."  
"Yeah" he sighs and sits down between the beds.  
"I'm off to the cafeteria and then an on-call room." Charles leaves Derek alone with Meredith and Mark. Charles stops by the nurses and gives them some last directives.

Mark is waking up and a nurse pulls out his ventilator. His head hurts, he is nauseous and his leg is in traction. Derek turns looks at him with tears in his eyes.  
"What happened?" Mark ask him.  
"You broke your leg in a car accident and Torres need to do some work on you."  
"Why are you here?" Mark asks and looks at the bed on the other side of Derek. His face turns even whiter then before when he sees Meredith.  
"Why is Grey here?"  
"She was in the accident with you. The two of you were doing a consultation together."  
"What's wrong?"  
"Head trauma, Charles did the surgery."  
"So he was here. I thought I had dreamt." He eyes are falling shut and he is soon sleeping again.

Shepherd continues watching over Meredith. After a little while Mark is taken back to his room. 12 hours after surgery is Meredith brought back to the ICU and she has not yet woken up and is still on the ventilator. Derek only leaves her side for bathroom and coffee. The nurses try to get him to sleep in an on-call room, Dr Webber, Dr Bailey and Dr Witt as well. He refuses and they let him stay the night.

No changes happen during the night bur now Dr Webber catches Derek on a coffee break and pulls him into his office. There he orders him to shower and leaves clean scrubs, coffee and a sandwich. Derek is not allowed to leave until he has eaten. Dr Witt is doing an exam of Meredith in the meantime and sends her to the MRI. Derek arrives first to her room at the ICU but before can start screaming at the nurses Meredith is wheeled back in. Dr Witt pulls him out of the room and gives him an update. The clot is gone but there is still a small bleed that they hope will stop by it self. They should be able to pull the ventilator out as soon as she wakes up.

Derek walks back in and is soon followed by Yang and Karev.  
"How is she?" they ask. Derek just sits there, his lips are moving but there is no sound. He rests his head on her bid and Yang and Karev leaves him alone with Meredith. They speak with Dr Witt instead. During the day lots of doctors and nurses passes by trying to comfort Derek or to talk to Meredith to encourage her to wake up.

There is no change during the following 48 hours and they are all afraid she will never wake up. It is 3 pm, more then 72 hours since surgery, when the door opens up for Lexie and Thatcher.  
"What is he doing here?" Derek asks.  
"I'm her closest living relative" Thatcher exclaims.  
"You are not, I'm her husband" Derek yells at him.  
"By what authority? You are nothing more than her boyfriend or fiancé and you have nothing to say about her medical treatment.

Both Lexie and Derek stare at him. Lexie wonders why Thatcher is so rude, is he drunk again? Derek blames himself for not pulling Meredith to city hall to legalize their commitment.  
"I want her off the ventilator. It is no use for her to lay here for God knows how long." Thatcher exclaims. "Take the tube out. She'll be better off dead together with Ellis or my wife Susan."  
"No, you are killings her" Derek screams.  
"Not anymore than she killed Susan" Thatcher exclaims. "It has been more than 72 hours, she is dead. Ask any doctor." Thatcher feels like that finally can he get his revenge on Susan's death. He misses her every day. The drink he took before entering the ICU really feels good and he will need another one soon.  
"Get him out of here Lexie, now!" Derek shouts.

The floor nurses are calling Dr Webber and Dr Witt to the ICU ASAP. Derek is in the meantime trying to throw Thatcher out of the room. Dr Webber arrives first and manages to get Thatcher out of the room and leaves Derek with Meredith. Dr Witt walks into the room.  
"What happened?" he asks.  
"Meredith's father wants to pull the tube out. He wants her to die" Derek's voice can't take it any longer. He starts crying again.  
"How can he claim that? You are her husband, right?"  
"Meredith and I have a signed contract between us, but we have never filed it at city hall." Derek explains to Charles. "Why didn't we make time?"

Dr Webber and Dr Witt walk into a conference room and shortly a hospital arrives, Thatcher and Derek are called in one at the time. Yang comes running to the ICU when she hears the gossip. She passes Meredith's locker and pulls the blue post-it note that has been sitting there fore a couple of months. Yang knocks on the door to the conference room.  
"Come in" she walks in and finds Dr Webber, Dr Witt and a lawyer is there. Their faces are grim.  
"Here" she says and hands over the blue note. The lawyer reads the note and shakes his head.  
"This note is not witnessed, sorry. Mr Grey has the right to make this decision."  
"Derek will loose his mind if Meredith dies."


	5. Chapter 5

Cristina Yang is sitting alone in the conference room when Owen Hunt finds her.

"Cristina, are you OK?" he asks. She doesn't answer. He walks up to her but she doesn't look at him. She is just staring at the blue post-it note in front of her

"I gave it to her" she says "and it is not enough." Owen lifts her onto his lap and hugs her. She is not crying.

Dr Witt and Dr Webber enter Meredith's room. Both Derek and Lexie are sitting there holding one hand each of Meredith. Both of them are crying. Derek is mumbling words that no one but Meredith can hear, if she can hear anything at all. His lips are grazing her earlobe. Lexie looks at the entering doctors but Derek ignores them.

"Derek I need to speak with you outside." Dr Webber says.

"No" Derek answers.

"I'll stay with her and so will her sister" says Dr Witt while Dr Webber gently pulls Derek out of his chair. Derek leans over the bed and kisses her forehead and whispers in her ear

"I love you. You are the love of my life. I'll be right back. I'm never going to leave you." Dr Webber leads him to the conference room.

The lawyer is there as well as Thatcher. Derek sits down and Dr Webber takes a chair next to him. The lawyer looks around the table.

"We are here to decide of the future treatment of Meredith Grey. I'm sorry to say that Dr Shepherd has no legal right to make this decision. It is Thatcher who is the closest living relative according to the law." Derek sinks deeper down into the chair, his head falls back and his skin turns paler then white. Thatcher is gloating.

"I want the tube out now."

"Please sign here" the lawyer pushes a sheet of paper across the table. Thatcher signs on the dotted line.

"Let's go" Richard says. He has trouble keeping his tear from pouring.

"I'm so sorry" the lawyer says to Derek, not acknowledging Thatcher. They all rise but for Derek.

"Come on Derek, you need to say good bye and be there for her." Derek is still not responding and they all look at him.

Thatcher opens the door and walks towards the restrooms. He is in need of a drink.

"I'll be with you in 5 minutes."

The conference room is silence. Suddenly Derek pushes his chair back and runs from the room towards the stairs. The door slams shut behind him. Dr Webber and the lawyer slowly walk towards the elevators. The nurses are all looking at them but nobody dares to speak. Dr Webber's face says it all.

Dr Webber and the lawyer enter Meredith's room. Lexie and Dr Witt are sitting talking about Meredith and Derek.

"Have you seen Derek?" Dr Webber asks them.

"No."

Thatcher walks into the room smiling.

"Let's do it."

Lexie stares at him with horror in her eyes.

"Do what exactly?" she asks her father.

"Take the tube out."

"No, you can't do let them do that. You can't let them kill Meredith!" She breaks down sobbing by the bed.

"Where is Dr Shepherd?" Dr Witt asks.

"We don't know. He left the conference room ahead of us."

"He must be here, you have to wait for him." Lexie claims between her sobs.

"I'll have him paged" Dr Webber says. A couple of minutes later they see Derek at the door followed by Meredith's friends and a lot of other doctors and nurses. Derek refuses to enter the room. He is just standing on the threshold staring at Meredith.

Dr Witt positions himself by the head of the bed.

"Are you ready?" Everyone but Thatcher is staring at him with horror in their eyes. Dr Witt's eyes are watering as well. He looks up and searches for Derek in the crowd. Webber does the same but he is not to be seen anywhere. Dr Witt takes a deep breath and pulls the tube out.


	6. Chapter 6

Derek is changing his clothes in his office. He will never be able to wear navy blue scrubs again. He throws them on the floor along with his lab coat and Id. He carefully puts the picture from his desk in his bag along with his lap-top. His diplomas are left on the wall. On his way out he rips down the sign Head of Neurodepartment, MD Derek Shepherd. Seattle Grace Hospital will have to find a replacement. The sign is dropped in a wastebasket in the hallway. His pager starts to beep and he smashes it into the wall. When his phone starts ringing he throws it into the nurses' station. Thankfully both pieces are finally silence. He takes the stairs because he can't stand the elevator as it carries to many memories of Meredith. He hears people calling his name in the lobby but he keeps moving forward and is soon sitting in his car. There are people running behind him but he doesn't care. Meredith is dead.

"I want Shepherd found." Dr Webber is yelling at them. "Find him now, before he does anything regrettable!"

Lexie checks in Mark's room, he isn't there. Cristina and Owen check the cafeteria and the on-call rooms together with Lexie. Richard is paging and calling him but his phone goes to voicemail. Bailey checks his office but can only report that he has been there. His scrubs are on the floor. The nurses have picked up the remains after his phone end tells Bailey that. Alex sees as Derek leaves the lobby but can't get him to wait and chases after the car.

Derek drives on auto pilot, not to the trailer, not to Meredith's house. He finds himself sitting at the dock, in their spot overlooking the ferryboats and then he finally he breaks down and cries. His sobs are shaking his body and an inhuman sound is heard.

The search team meets in the conference room. They send one team to Meredith's house and another to the trailer. Bailey goes to Joe's bar and Dr Webber needs to talk to Dr Witt. When Cristina Yang passes Derek's office, she looks inside when she notice that the nameplate outside is missing. She also sees that the picture of Meredith and Derek is missing from his desk. She calls Webber and informs him about her founding. It doesn't look like Dr Derek Shepherd is planning to return.

Derek finally stops crying. He feels empty and that it is nothing left for him in Seattle. There is but only one place in the world that he wants to be in right now. He drives to the airport and buys a one-way ticket to New York. It is only 30 minutes until departure and he moves swiftly through security. When he reaches the gate, there is a call for him over the speaker system. He ignores everything and everyone, his only goal is to get on the plane and leave Seattle. They start boarding and he sinks down in his first class seat. His only luggage is his lap-top bag and he pulls out the picture of Meredith, clutches it in his arms and goes to sleep.

Dr Webber has tried everything he can think of. He has even called the airport and got them to call Shepherds name over the speaker system. Nothing, no one has seen him since he left the parking lot. Finally he decides to talk to Mark, who due to his pain, is on morphine drip and hasn't yet been told about Meredith. He asks him where he believes Derek might be. Alex Karev is calling Addison Montgomery to ask the same. They both say that he will go to his father grave or home to his mother. If he isn't there they don't know.

Miranda Bailey runs into Thatcher at Joe's. He is drinking heavily, crying, rambling.

"Is it true?" Joe asks Miranda.  
"Yes"  
"Do want me to throw him out?"  
"That wouldn't be too soon"

A couple of hours later Derek steps out of the plane. The picture is back in his bag. He rents a car and leaves for the cemetery. After a two hour drive he arrives and goes to sit by the headstone. He talks to his father about Meredith, the plans he had for them in the future and his own future that he can't see anymore. After a while he fall in to a slumber, emotionally beat out. He wakes up when he feels an embrace and hears his old nickname Derbear. It is his mother and it is enough to get him to cry again.

"What are you doing here? You have a whole hospital looking for you. Meredith needs you."

"Meredith is dead."


	7. Chapter 7

"No, that is where you are wrong. She is very much alive, just unconscious. Dr Webber, Dr Bailey and Addison are worrying sick. They tried to stop you but you left."

"She is alive? How, Charles pulled her tube out!"

"According to Dr Webber so took she her first breathe as soon as the tube was pulled. But she is still unconscious."

"I need to get back, can I borrow your phone, because mine is broken."

"Do you want me to go with you?"

"Would you? I love you mum, please do."

The next plane is in 4 hours with a stop over in Chicago. Mother and son are both on it. Derek has spoken to Webber and Witt and is told that nothing has changed. She is still alive.

When they arrive to Seattle Thatcher has a new plan. He wants Meredith removed from the hospital and into a nursing home in Boston. He claims she has her relatives there. He is still drunk and the lawyer is not complying with him. Webber and Witt are doing everything they can to stop a transfer by medical reasons. The decision is delayed for 72 hours, when the Shepherds walk through the door to Meredith's room. Derek is scared, everyone they have met in the hospital have been staring at him. No one has tried to talk to him. Meredith is laying there breathing on her own. It looks like she is sleeping. He gently brushes her lips with his and strokes her hair. He sits down by her side and grabs hold of a hand. He is blaming himself for leaving her but he is so grateful that she is breathing. Dr Witt soon arrives and updates him while comforting him by putting a hand on his shoulder.

His mother leaves them alone and walks to Mark's room. Mark has started rehabilitation and Carolyn returns with him in a wheelchair. Derek follows Dr Witt to the scanroom to look at Meredith's latest scans.

Mark wheels up to Meredith's head, takes her hand in his and starts talking to her. It is the first time he sees her since the recovery room.

"You have to wake up Mer, You can't leave me alone in the DM-club. It is lonely without you here. Her eyelids starts to flutter and suddenly she looks up into his eyes. Mrs Shepherd runs to the nurses.

"Page Dr Witt" she yells. A nurse follows her back and soon both Charles and Derek returns running into the room.

"What happened?"  
"She opened her eyes" Mrs Shepherd says. Dr Witt does a neuro exam but nothing.  
"I'm sure, she looked at me." When Mark speaks, Meredith opens her eyes again and looks at him. They all see it. Derek tries to get her to look at him but get no response. She only opens her eyes when Mark is talking.

Dr Witt orders a new MRI and it shows a small bleed that needs to be stopped. Dr Witt goes to scrub in. Mark and Mrs Shepherd go to the cafeteria to meet with Lexie and Derek goes to the closed gallery. This time he has more hope, she is breathing on her own before surgery and she has been semi conscious. In the closed gallery he finds Bailey, Yang, Hunt and Webber. Assisting Dr Witt is Dr Karev. Derek nods at them but doesn't speak to them. They all watch the surgery in silence, when suddenly Dr Witt drops to his knees. He doubles over and Alex catches him. Meredith's brain is open on the table.


	8. Chapter 8

Derek jumps to the intercom but no one answers. They are busy helping Dr Witt on to a gurney. Hunt is running down followed by the rest in the gallery. Derek strips down to his jeans and tee shirt and starts to scrub in. Meredith needs a neurosurgeon to finish the procedure before she dies. Dr Webber follows him into the OR.

"Can you do this?" Dr Webber asks.

"Who else can?" Shepherd answers. "You can assist along with Karev." Derek gets gloves and a gown on and continues the surgery. The clot is removed and the bleeding stopped within minutes. He works without any thoughts but technical issues on his mind. He stops and asks a nurse to close up and leaves the room without another word. Webber and Karev are just staring at him. They see through the window that he is scrubbing out and disappears from sight. When they enter the scrub room they find him on the floor hugging his knees, crying. When he hears them he slowly sits up and asks for Meredith' stats.

"They are bringing her to recovery now." Shepherd slowly walks in that direction. The emotions he has been through the last 24 hours are taken their toll on him.

Mark, Lexie and Mrs Shepherd are discussing the post-it wedding. They all agree that something has to be done before Mrs Shepherd returns to New York. She has decided to stay until both Mark and Derek are fine. In Mark's case that means that he needs to be able to walk with a cane and for Derek to be properly wed to Meredith.

Dr Witt suffers from a hearth attack and Dr Yang and Dr Hunt are doing angioplasty surgery on him.

Derek sits down by Meredith's bed and wait. She is still under sedation and it will be a while before she can wake up. He is falling asleep with her hand in his. Suddenly he feels her fingers moving. He gently stokes her hand.

"Mer, wake up please. Open your eyes for me. I love you." Meredith's eyes flutter open and she stares at him before her going back to sleep. Derek performs a quick neuro exam on her with a borrowed penlight. It is soon decided that it is safe to leave the ICU.

Derek goes looking for his mum and Mark and finds them in the rehabilitation. Mark is swearing and his mother and Lexie is laughing at him. Mark is trying to stand on his own but keeps falling over.

"Are you on drugs, Mark?" Derek asks him.

"The nurses are very pretty and very kind to me. I get almost everything I want." He says with a cute smile.

"How is Meredith, is she OK?" Lexie asks.

"Yeah, she opened her eyes, the tube is out and everything is looking good. They are transferring her to her room. No more glass walls."

"That's really good. Can we see her?"

"Sure, come along." Derek answers.

They go together to Meredith's room. Derek is pushing Mark in a wheelchair. Meredith is just being moved to her bed after being at the MRI. Derek takes a look at her scans and Mrs Shepherd and Mark sits on the coach. Lexie has to go to work. The scans look OK and Derek takes a seat on the other side of the bed. They all talk in low voices while the heart monitor beeps in the background.

Meredith wakes up hearing voices. Unknown voices talking about people whose name she can't recall. She listens for a while before she has the energy to open her eyes. She tries to focus and shakes her head in an attempt to clear it. Her head hurt, it hurts a lot. The most beautiful blue eyes are looking at her. They look like they care.

"Where am I?"

"You're in the hospital." Blue eyes say with tears in his eyes. Why does he have tears in his eyes? He looks happy, but his tears are pouring. Who are the other two on the coach?

"Who are you?" They look at each other, blue eyes and the other two. Suddenly blue eyes eyes are not as happy as before. Derek's doctor training kicks in.

"I'm one of the doctors that preformed your surgery. Can you please tell me your name?" She looks confused. I should know my name, she thinks but it is absolutely blank, nothing pops up.

"I don't know." She says with tears in her eyes and in her voice. Doctor blue eyes take her hand and stokes it gently.

"You have been in a car accident and got a blow to your head. You have been on a ventilator for more than 72 hours and have had two brain surgeries. Amnesia is a common side effect and usually disappears within a couple of days. I will call a nurse and have her take your vitals again and I'll be back in a while." Derek motions to Mark and his mum to follow him.

Outside the door, he falls apart and slides down the wall. He rests his head on his knees. Mark pulls the wheelchair over to the nurses' station and Mrs Shepherd sits down beside Derek.

"Derbear, you have to give her time, her memory will be back. You said so yourself."

"I know, but I also know that during the recovery she will remember everything and a lot of these memories will hurt her, like when I left her for Addison. And right now I really need to hug her, kiss her, let her cuddle in my arms."

Dr Webber has been paged by the nurses and walks up to them.

"How is Meredith?"

"She doesn't remember her name. We have to start an amnesia protocol. Please inform the nurses and anyone else that want to se her.


	9. Chapter 9

When Derek had composed himself enough he re-enters Meredith's room. He is thankful that she is talking, hearing and alive, but he is so scared she won't remember their life together. He loves her more then life itself and not being able to show her that is killing him. She is sleeping, even snoring and he smiles. It is the most beautiful sound in the world except for her giggle. When she sleeps she can tell her all that. He can tell her how much he loves her. He can stroke her hair and kiss her forehead.

She wakes up after a while. Derek can see how much her head hurts.

"Do you want something for your head?" Dr blue eyes asks her.

"That would be good." He takes a syringe from the cabinet and pushes a dose into her IV-line. He can almost see how her body relaxes. He performs a quick neuro exam and writes his results into her chart. He is standing by the foot of her bed and his eyes are trained on her.

"How are you feeling now?"

"Better, my head doesn't hurt anymore."

"Do you remember your name?"

"No."

"Can you tell me something that you believe is a memory?"

"The DM-club."

"The DM-club? What is that?"

"I don't know but it keeps coming up in my head. Do you know what it is for club?"

"No, I'm sorry I don't know. Anything else you can tell me?"

"I know that muesli taste like cardboard."

"So you don't eat muesli?" he asks with a smirk.

"I don't know but I don't think so since it taste like cardboard." She smiles at him. He gives her a smile that makes her feel all tingly. The smile reminds her of something.

The door opens and crashes into the wall. Thatcher enters the room and stares at her.

"It is true, evil can't be destroyed. You should be…" Derek pushes him out into the hallway but Meredith can still hear the end of the sentence "dead." She wonders who that evil person is. Dr blue eyes is talking in a hush voice but she can still hear him.

"You should leave now. Don't ever come back here when you are drunk. Meredith doesn't even remember her name. You have nothing to decide about for her anymore. She is staying here and you are leaving the hospital now."

Meredith is that my name? She kind of likes it, especially the way Dr blue eyes says it. Her mind is drifting and she falls into a slumber. She is dreaming about a blonde guy talking about the DM-club and saying that she is the vice president. He is the president and they should stick together. Next a man that looks a lot like Dr blue eyes eat a bowl of muesli. The picture glides over until it looks like that yelling evil mans face and that man hits her cheek. It hurts a lot and she is sad because Susan is dead.

Mrs Shepherd comes by and forces Derek to go to the cafeteria. She tells him that she has been invited to stay at Meredith's house by her friends. She'll be leaving in a little while. Derek decides to take her himself since Meredith is sleeping. Alex Karev meets them at the house. Izzy Stevens is sleeping, due to the cancer treatment she is enduring. Mrs Shepherd will be sleeping in George's room. She forces Derek to take a shower and change clothes. Before dressing he lays down on the bed, just to rest for a couple of minutes. When he isn't downstairs after an hour, Mrs Shepherd checks on him. He is sleeping hugging Meredith's pillow. She pulls the comforter over him and kisses him good night.

Meredith sleeps through out the night, with lots of dreams. When she wakes up she finds the blonde guy in a wheelchair by her bed. It is the guy from the dream about the DM-club.

"What is the DM-club?" She asks. He starts laughing.

"You can't remember your name but you remember the DM-club!"

"You are the president and I am the vice president."

"Do you remember anything else?" He asks.

"Yeah, that muesli tastes like cardboard."

"Please tell Derek that." He laughs. Derek walks in just then. He looks refreshed and has found new scrubs and a clean lab coat. He even got a new Id-card from HR. Maintenance would be putting his name plate back on the wall during the day.

"Hi Mark." He says before remembering the amnesia protocol. It sucks when it comes to Meredith. He looks at Meredith and asks her about her night.

"Did you sleep well?"

"Yes, but I had some dreams. Maybe you could help me with some of them. I dreamt about a woman named Susan who is dead. I also heard you call me Meredith yesterday when that horrible man came into my room. He hit me in my dream. Mark here, I heard you call him that," she smiles "has something to do with the DM-club and someone who looks like you eats muesli. How much wrong is that?"

"Not much." Derek frowns. Why is she remembering Mark, Susan and Thatcher when he and she have so much more in common? He would really love if she remembers more about them.

"Is your name Derek?" She asks him.

She has connected the dots from Mark's comment about telling Derek about muesli.

"Yes, my name is Derek Shepherd." He looks at her with a smile and suddenly she gets a flashback. 'A bar, man in a fleece-jacket introduces himself, I'm Derek Shepherd and I want you to know me. Over his shoulder she sees Mark, founder of the Dirty Mistresses club looking at her and then walking away'. She looks at Derek first and then Mark.

"I know you. You Mark, are the founder of the Dirty Mistresses club, the DM-club and you Derek wants me to know you. I met you two in a bar. Derek you were dressed like you had been outdoors or something." Derek and Mark look at each other.

"You are right, that happened more than a year ago. Do you remember anything else?"

"No, but is it you who like to eat muesli?"

"Yes, look Meredith, I need to do a new neuro exam and then we are going to let you rest for a while. I will be back later. Meredith looks into his blue eyes and thinks about how sexy he looks in his navy scrubs.

Derek and Mark leaves and Meredith goes back to sleep. It doesn't feel like she could get enough sleep. She hasn't even been out of bed yet. She wouldn't mind sleeping with Dr Derek Shepherd. She falls asleep and dream about pulling his navy blue scrubs off as he pulls her light blue scrub off. A pager beeps and she wakes up, trying to silence it. When she opens her eyes she sees a woman, Asian with dark curly hair leaving her room, muttering. "Bailey."

Meredith goes back to sleep and dreams about her first day as an intern. She remembers Cristina, George and Izzy. They are walking towards a short dark woman. The woman is referred to as 'the Nazi'. She gives them a speech about being the lowest on the surgical floor. They are nobodies, doing grunt work and answering every call with a run. She is researching a head trauma case with Cristina and then she is scrubbing in with Dr Shepherd. It was the most amazing feeling ever, standing by the table looking into a brain. Cristina was mad at her, because she wanted the surgery. She thought Meredith got it because she slept with the attending. A red shirt, a smile and a marvellous guy presenting him as Derek while she is dressed in a blanket. Then suddenly a red haired woman walks up to them and presents herself as Addison Shepherd and 'you must be the woman screwing my husband'. She is sitting in the rain crying. Derek tries to comfort her but she tells him to go, go home to his wife. She wakes up crying.

"Why are you crying?" Asks an older woman, the same woman who was there with Mark and Derek when she woke up, looks at her. She looks nice, like she cares about her, Meredith.

"I dreamt about my ex boyfriends wife showing up."


	10. Chapter 10

The door opens and Derek walks in.

"Oh, hi mum" he says "Mark is looking for you." He stops when he sees that Meredith is awake with tears in her eyes.

"Why are you crying? Is your head hurting?" He rushes up to her bed and pulls out his penlight.

"No" she says. "It was just a dream." She keeps her eyes on the bedspread, twisting it in her hands. It is clear that she is trying to keep her distance to him. He looks at his mum with questions in his eyes. She looks at the door and back at him. He gets the unspoken message loud and clear. He turns to Meredith and says,

"I'll be back in a little while, wait for me." He walks towards the door as his mother says.

"It's nice seeing you Meredith."

Meredith is having a flashback. She is suddenly outside, in a house she has made out of candles. She is waiting for someone. Stupid, brainless, brainman. Someone is standing outside the lights. I wanted to build a house, but I am a surgeon and I don't build houses. The man is now standing with her, holding her, kissing her. He stops, looks at her with his McDreamy smile and says. I have to go. In order to kiss you like I want to kiss you, in order to do more then kiss you. I have to talk to Rose. I want my conscious clear. Wait here, wait for me. He walks back into the night. She turns around and is now standing at the nurses' station. Derek's mother walks up towards her and she says to Mrs Shepherd I'm not bright and shiny. I'm dark and twisty. The ponytail and the smiling with the teeth that is fake, it is not me. It's been nice meeting you, Mrs Shepherd says.

Derek and his mum are standing outside Meredith's room.

"Why is she crying?" Derek asks.

"She had a dream about her ex boyfriend's wife showing up."

"Oh, no."

"You have to go in there and answer every question she got."

"What if she doesn't forgive me this time, mum?"

"She will when she gets her memory back in total."

Yang interrupts them.

"Is it OK if I go in there?"

"Please do" Derek says "but please don't make her believe that I am the bad guy. She just remembered when Addison showed up."

Cristina knocks on the door and opens it.

"How is my person doing today?" She asks. Meredith's memory recognizes that line. Cristina is her person as she is hers. It is Cristina who got left in the church by Dr Preston Burke and then found the hot army doctor Dr Hunt who almost strangled her.

"Fine." She answers. Cristina looks at her with a smirk.

"Meredith fine or really fine?"

"You tell me. Addison showed up and told me that I slept with her husband. Then I was standing in a house of candles and Derek told me to wait because he had to speak with Rose and I told Mrs Shepherd that I am dark and twisty and she said it's been nice meeting me. Is this good? It feels really, really bad."

"It is true everything. Your memory is coming back and you are rambling."

"Who is Derek to me?"

"That is for you to remember."

They both look at the door when something or someone crashes into it. They hear load voices that are both male.

"That room is out of limit for you!"

"She is my daughter. I am to decide what treatment she needs."

"No, you are not deciding anything. You had your chance and you tried to kill her."

"She is evil, just as Ellis was."

"Ellis was not evil, just preoccupied with work and Meredith is nothing like her. She is an excellent doctor and has her priorities right. Derek and Meredith spend as much time together as possible. They have a marriage everyone should envy. Meredith also makes time for her friends."

"They are not married, post-it notes, what joke is that?"

"They are married in their hearths. Just because the law doesn't accept it doesn't mean they are less then married." There is silence in the hall. The nurses are looking from their station and doctors and other personal are gathering in the hall. Dr Webber realizes that he is making a scene with Thatcher. He lowers his voice.

"Meredith is almost back to normal and will decide on her own treatment. You should go and sober up. There is an AA-meeting this afternoon and you should be there." When Webber says AA-meeting Thatcher straightens like he's got a slap. He looks at Richard and then the door and turns around and walks towards the elevator. Lexie just looks at him when he passes her. Inside the room is it quiet, Meredith's mind is racing. Cristina doesn't know what to say or do. Meredith curls into a little ball and starts crying, her sobs are shaking her.

"What do you need, Mer?"

"Derek"

Derek and his mother are at rehab and watches Mark balancing on his broken leg. He will be going home soon. Derek looks at his new pager when it beeps. Meredith's room from Yang. He leaves in a run. When he reaches the surgical floor there are a lot of people hanging around. Everybody is looking at Dr Webber who is red in his face and at Yang blocking Meredith's door.

"Let me in Dr Yang."

"No, she only wants Dr Shepherd, Sir." Derek feels a surge in his stomach. She wants him, maybe she remembers them. He pushes forward past the crowd and asks with a high voice if they don't have any work to do or patients to care about. The crowd scatters and returns to what ever they were doing before. He walks towards Yang and Webber.

"What's up?"

"I had an argument with Thatcher out here and we were too loud." Webber confesses.

"Yeah, you were too loud and now Meredith is crying in there and she wants you Dr Shepherd."

"Tell me what she heard."

Yang tells him what she heard sitting inside the room. Shepherd sends Webber a look and opens the door. He closes the door behind him and looks at the tiny person crying in the bed. His hearth breaks when he hears her sobs.

"Mer" he says. There is no response from Meredith. He walks up to her side and strokes her hair away from her face. Her sobs are shaking her but she reaches out for him. His hearth swells as he climbs into her bed and gathers her in his arms. She puts her head on his chest. He lays there stroking her hair until her sobs stops.

"Are you OK, Mer?"

"I am now" she whispers.

They lay there for a little while longer just breathing, not a word is said.

"I would like to shower and wash my hair. Can you help me and can you find me some clothes?" Derek rolls out of bed and gathers her in his arms.

"Put me down, let me go?"

"I don't think so." He puts her down on a bench in the shower stall. He turns on the water.

"Do you need help with the robe? Let me help you with the bandage on you head." He helps her unwrap the bandage and puts a waterproof Band-Aid over the scar.

"I'm just going to fetch your bag. You can start soaking." He says with a smile. He is back within a couple of minutes with her shower crème, shampoo and conditioner.

"Just give me a shout when you are ready." He walks back into the hall where Webber is hovering.

"How is she?" He asks.

"I don't know. She is not talking yet. She wanted a shower and I left her in it. Cancel all my work I'm taking the rest of this and next week off. She'll stay here tonight but I'm taking her home tomorrow if the scans are OK. Put a sign on this door 'Knock before entering'. All severe head trauma goes to Mercy West until I am back."

Derek returns to the room and Meredith. He pokes his head into the bathroom.

"Your clothes are in the bag on the bench."

"Thanks."

Five minutes later she returns dressed in her Dartmouth tee shirt and yoga pants. Her hair is pulled back into a ponytail. Derek is sitting on the coach reading a medical journal. She climbs on to the coach and snuggles up into his lap. He wraps his arms around her.

"Meredith, I love you. You are the love of my life." He breaths her in, lavender his all-time favourite scent when it is on Meredith.

"I love you more." She whispers back.

"Do you remember everything now?"

"I think I do. Different word has triggered different memories and muesli taste like cardboard." She smiles at him. "Can you explain the argument I heard between Richard and Thatcher?"

"I have to start with the car crash you and Mark were in. Is that OK?" She nods and he starts talking. Meredith's tears starts running when he tells her about Mark's leg. The tears dry up when he tells her about Thatcher and starts again when he tells her about taking her off the ventilator. Derek is also crying now. They both laugh at her first memories and sober up when he tells her about the last argument. They stay in each others arms for a very long time until there is a knock on the door. In comes Alex.

"Would you like some company? There are a lot of people out there that wants to see you Mer." Derek looks at Meredith.

"Would you like to see them?" She nods slowly. Derek makes a quick decision and tells Alex to meet them in the cafeteria.

"Is that OK?" He asks Meredith.

"Yeah, then we can get back here alone when ever we want to."

In the cafeteria they get a table in the far most corner. All their friends are there including Dr Witt. Meredith goes to Mark who is sitting in his wheelchair. She climbs onto his lap and hug him close while whispering in his ear.

"Let's keep the DM-club but keep it resting. Luck is on the dirty mistresses' side in spite of the accident."

"You better get back to Shepherd before he and Lexie makes up a plan to kill us both." He says as he hugs her back. She walks over to Derek and his mum and sits in his lap. With her head resting on his shoulder she listens to all her friends talking and laughing. After a while she falls to sleep and Derek carries her back to her room. The rest of their friends stay and makes some plans for the next day.

The next morning Derek sends her to the MRI and a complete neuro exam. Dr Witt is doing it. When the pictures are back they show that there is no need for her to stay at the hospital. When she returns to her room there is a bag with her jeans and a lavender sweater to wear. Mrs Shepherd has left jeans, a white button down shirt and an indigo sweater for Derek in his office with a note 'Put these on and pick up Meredith in her room'. He wonders what his mum is up to.

Derek walks out of the hospital holding Meredith's hand and carrying her bag.

"Let's go home Mer." His mother pulls up to the curb in his car. They climb in, Meredith in the back seat. She doesn't feel comfortable in the passenger seat.

"We have a small detour to do before going home." Mrs Shepherd says.

"OK" they both respond. After a couple of blocks Derek asks.

"Where are we going?"

"We'll be there in less then five minutes."

The car stops outside a large building.

"Come along, both of you." She says and steps out of the car.

"Follow me." When they walk towards the entry they both wonders what they are doing at city hall.

"Mum, what are we doing here?"

"Fixing a small problem." She answers. When they arrive at the right floor they are shown into a small room. Mark is standing there as well as Cristina, alongside an unknown man. Mrs Shepherd takes a seat in the back of the room.

"What?" They both ask. Mark answers.

"We need fix this problem now. You two are getting married right now." They look at each other in silence before two equally bright smiles appear on their faces.

"Shall we begin?" Cristina asks. The magistrate takes his place and begins.

"We are here to wed Dr Derek Shepherd and Dr Meredith Grey." He continues talking about the obligations and asks them if they want this.

"Yes I do" both of them answers without letting go of each others eyes. Cristina hands them their promises, their blue post-it note and they say them as they did when they wrote them. Mark hands them two platinum rings. The magistrate puts in his final line.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride." Derek gathers her face in his hand and slowly kisses her. Meredith deepens the kiss until Mark and Cristina starts laughing.

"Congratulations Dr and Dr Shepherd." The magistrate says and hands Derek a signed document.

"Party at Joe's" Cristina says.

"Welcome to family" Mrs Shepherd says as she hugs Meredith.

The five of them leaves city hall and at Joe's there is a party waiting with all of their friends.

THE END

_A/N Thank you everyone that has read this story. An extra BIG thank you to everyone who has written a review. You have made me very happy since this is my first story ever. My second will be posted shortly and is named Memories of the past.  
~mcanna_


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